I miss him.

I used to wake up every morning thinking about him, wondering what he was doing and if he was thinking about me. I would sit up in bed and talk to him about my plans for the day, and ask for his advice on the things I couldn't figure out. He was a good listener, never interrupting me with his own ideas or opinions. He let me cry it out when I needed, without thinking less of me. He would bring me little gifts- like freshly made coffee, warm towels, or some little thing I had admired somewhere else. He introduced me to people that he knew I would enjoy. He reassurred me when I was scared, prying my fears from my fingertips and replacing them with loving kisses... relaxation, faith, security, pure love.

Eventually, of course I cheated on him. I got distracted and started focusing on other things....temptations. I turned my back, calling him a little less and telling him very little when we spoke. I hid from him. I started to believe that I did not need a relationship to define myself. I could work things out on my own. That he did not understand me, or the people I loved. I knew he could never forgive me.

Now I miss him and know that none of my doubts are true. I miss feeling my heart full of love and joy from spending time with him and enjoying the delights of our relationship. He gave me the meaning of my life. Now, I want it back. Should I call on him?